I wanted to be a dancer, a math teacher, a mechanic, a fashion designer, a lawyer, and finally an Ag. Teacher. When I was little I believed that I had the whole world at my fingers, and everything was mine for the taking. It didn't matter that I had little rhythm, needed a calculator for simple math, only knew how to change tires and oil filters, would rather have dressed like a boy, and only really wanted to yell ' I OBJECT!,' for no apparent reason. This was something that at the time I could completely over look, because these were my dreams. I danced in my room and with my mom all the time, I loved that hard math was easy for me, working with my hands to accomplish something made me smile, dressing barbies allowed me to create, and being a lawyer would let me help others. Eventually though, all these dreams slipped away, because I saw something else that I thought I loved more. There was the obvious option though, I was going to be a fashion designing dancer, who taught math on the side as I fixed my students' cars while I helped them sue the person who hit their car. Simple, right?
Why was it so simple when I was young to dream that I could do anything, that anything could happen. I believed in fairy tales coming true, first loves that were forever, love at first site, perfect worlds, happiness that never faded and most of all that all my wildest dreams would come true if I wanted them too. As I grew up these ideas disappeared with the hopes of them happening. I was not going to find my Little Mermaid love, my first love destroyed my world, I hadn't had someone see me and fall in love with me forever, my world started to crumble down, I was rarely happy, and I began to not dream. I felt having no expectations for myself or my life would be best, since anything that happened positively would be more than amazing that way.
Every once in a while I go back to that idea, as sad as it really is, it helps. When things just don't go your way it allows you to see the positive. It's one of those things in life that give you hope, even in your darkest moments. I can still believe that something great can still happen. I can still believe that any of my dreams and wishes were possible. Often I wonder why it takes these bad things to make me see the good that can come and why I only thought it was okay to dream when I was young.
Nothing is going to stop me now, not when I have all the potential in the world to do what makes me happy and love every last second of it. I can say that my dreams are going to come true, no matter what it takes to make them happen, because this time I have the passion I need to do it. I have the faith in my abilities, and trust that I can and will make a difference because of THIS dream. My dream, that was not mentioned in more than being listed as becoming an Agricultural Educator. I know that this way, I can have my fairy tale, because I will be in love with my job, and I will have my wildest dreams come true, since I will be helping others make their come true.
When I was little I never wanted to be an Ag. Teacher, but when I found something that gave me a reason to dream again I could see the world changing in front of me. There comes a time in everyone's life when we have that moment, that 'ta-dah' moment, and we realize that everything that has happened before doesn't matter, because we have our chance to make our wishes and dreams reality, but we aren't ready to follow. That moment came when I was 15 at a life changing conference for kids all over the state my age. I don't know if anyone else had their moment that week, but maybe they are in that same boat with me.
I made a wish on a shooting star, and now, no matter where I go I will make that wish come true.
