i never told you...

At some point in our lives, maybe even at many points, we begin to look back on the way things have been so far. We examine the person that we have been, the choices that we've made and all the different things that we may even regret. When chapters of our lives come to an end most people start to do this. They think about how fast it all went, the great times they had, and the should have, could have, would have's.


A teacher of mine gave his 'last lesson' today during class and really got me to thinking. He spoke about how he never had the courage to tell the girl that he had loved since 6th grade how he felt about it. Only during an anonymous complimenting that he was brave enough to do this. Then he questioned how could his life be different now, he thought about the would have's. Even at this point in life I know that I don't want to look back and think that way. I want to live my life in a way that while I might make the wrong choices. I will know that I made choices that were exactly everything  that I wanted, in that moment. They might be ones that seconds after I have decided to do them I wonder maybe this was not my shinning moment, but I wanted it and that means it means something to me.


I believe this is a way to live each day. We will face choices each and every moment of our lives; do what makes you happy, be who you want, live your life because it is what you want to do, not what someone else does. In life we only get a few do-overs, if any. Why hold our breath for something that may never happen? Why not take the chance to make it happen? Even if we wish we decided to not do it in the end, in the moment was it worth it?


I know I want to be able to say to my family when I am 60, 'you know, I may have made some bad choices but dang if you could have been there!" I know that I don't want to look back on my life and wonder what could have happened if I told someone 'I love you,' questioning if they would have said it back. I know I don't want to go back to my reunion and tell someone I never told you, but...